Soon, the chickens will come home to roost

Deposed and killed Libyan leader, Muammar Gaddafi, once described the people who had risen against him in demand for freedom as rats. This was at a time when Brother Leader – as he was affectionately known elsewhere – was mobilising the best defence possible against, well, the 'marauding rats' who were no longer satisfied with simply nibbling at slices of national cheddar but wanted, nay, demanded the whole brick.

The use of animal imagery in politics is always amusing; first for the humour it comes wrapped in and second, for the insincerity and hypocrisy it exposes on the part of one who uses it. Robert Mugabe's ZANU-PF once declared to a stunned nation that even if it were to put a baboon on the ballot paper as its election candidate, the people would still vote for that ZANU-PF baboon as opposed to the human candidates from other parties.

Someone should have read that famous book by George Orwell, Animal Farm, to ZANU-PF and categorically state that if the people were to vote for this baboon, it is only because they could no longer tell the difference between the humans in power and the baboons in the wild. The human being has become a baboon and the baboon has become a human being.

Imagine the uncouth way in which ZANU-PF has treated the people of Zimbabwe, the ugliness with which they have played their politics and indeed, the plunder of the national cake by a troop of selected individuals, which is clearly reaping where it did not sow. Add the kiss-our-buttocks attitude that has followed calls for reform and accountability and there you have them, the baboons indeed!

And so it turns out there is a resolute determination in this country to follow the path of destruction taken by Zimbabwe to the letter. Introduce also, in addition to the fuel and forex shortages, power cuts, water shortages, bad governance, executive arrogance and ignorance, the use of animal imagery and you have a fitting clone and important lesson on how not to run a country.

According to president Bingu wa Mutharika, some amongst us are chickens. Maybe we are, Mr President; what with the eggs and meat we continue to deliver at State House, fattening its residents while we ourselves get thinner and thinner as a result of the rations we continue to suffer. Meanwhile, in our state of hunger and starvation, we are still expected to shower praises on some allegedly dynamic and wise leadership just as it was at Animal Farm:

"It had become usual to give Napoleon the credit for every successful achievement and every stroke of good fortune. You would often hear one hen remark to another, 'Under the guidance of our Leader, Comrade Napoleon, I have laid five eggs in six days'; or two cows, enjoying a drink at the pool, would exclaim, 'Thanks to the leadership of Comrade Napoleon, how excellent this water tastes!'"

Quite evidently, however, this leadership is neither wise nor dynamic but rather arrogant and treats its people with contempt. That is precisely how it has become that we are stuck with this debauched machinery of governance. Hence, it is nothing short of tragedy that president Mutharika and the government of Malawi at large continue to ignore the challenges plaguing this country, focusing rather on insulting citizens whom they have force-driven to their wits' end. It is the arrogance of a leadership that has its mindset frozen in the time warp of feudal politics, believing Malawi was its fiefdom – or chicken coop, if you like.

Still, Mutharika's formidable array of excuses as to why we find ourselves with this repulsive air of national malaise hanging over us simply need to be dismissed with the contempt they deserve. We demand more honesty Your Excellency, seeing that your regime's catalogue of flagitious offences against the people of Malawi are well documented and you must be held to account surely.

While Malawians continue to surprise themselves everyday by the way in which they are able to absorb the shock and horror so faithfully delivered by Mutharika and his cronies, they must not get accustomed to this way for living because it simply is not the way to live in any country, let alone one that claims to be a democracy. Once all this suffering is internalised and embraced, then there can never be a way out of all these insults and the wild expectation that as they are delivered, in the most unpresidential language and tone there is, we must all be somehow grateful for them.

Gaddafi is dead but the 'rats' live on, despite having some problems of their own. ZANU-PF cannot even begin to think of fielding that baboon in the next election as it has become aware of the divisions within and the reality of losing an election has sobered them up. The animal imagery no longer holds any power.

As for the crying chickens in Malawi, well, they may be coming home to roost soon but rest assured it is not for leisure purposes. At some point too, these chickens would want to run free.

Cat scratch debate: leashed, licensed or lethally injected

Don’t be scaredy cats about licensing Hamilton felines, city councillors were told Tuesday.

More than 25 people spoke at a special planning committee meeting about the city’s proposed new animal control bylaw, which suggests eliminating pet limits and regulating “roaming” cats like dogs, with enforcement based solely on complaints.

But several impassioned presenters said the bylaw will fail to reduce the number of cats euthanized each year — 3,000 or so — because it doesn’t mandate licensing the animals.

The previous council voted to axe the controversial idea of cat licensing from the early development of the comprehensive bylaw, which is meant to reconcile a hodgepodge of sometimes contradictory preamalgamation rules about pets.

“You need to find the courage to license cats,” said city resident and vocal cat advocate Margaret Strecker. “We do have to recognize we have a cat crisis.”

Animal services manager Sue O’Dwyer told councillors the city has cut the number of cats euthanized this year by more than 840, compared to 2010.

That’s encouraging, said Strecker, but not enough.

“The bylaw is called the responsible animal ownership bylaw. This is something all responsible cat owners want.”

The licensing idea is “controversial,” admitted Keith Scott, president of the Hamilton-Burlington SPCA, but also necessary to combat the view of cats as “disposable strays.”

Councillor Lloyd Ferguson asked Scott how he would convince residents the licensing scheme is not a “money grab” by the city.

Scott suggested it’s a matter of fairness.

“Licensing is one tool to promote responsible pet ownership,” he said. “Dog owners should not be the only ones required to be responsible.”

Most feline fans applauded the bylaw proposal to end pet limits.

Local veterinarian Liz O’Brien said the move will make wary multiple-pet owners more likely to spay, neuter and microchip their cats.

But she also urged councillors not to consider licensing “a dirty word.”

“In the past, I might have opposed it, too,” she said. “But through education, I see the benefits. I would sell this (idea) to my clients, if you do it.”

No decisions were made at Tuesday’s meeting, but Councillor Terry Whitehead said it might be time to “take another shot” at the licensing debate.

More than 30 residents sent in written opinions on the bylaw.

Close to a dozen verbal and written submissions were made Tuesday by opponents of the urban chicken ban. Their efforts might end up earning fugitive fowl farmers a reprieve. Councillor Jason Farr asked for a comprehensive staff report on the idea of regulating, rather than banning, back yard chickens. It will be considered some time in the first three months of 2012.

No Injuries From Wild Ride

A Mountain Ranch man was not injured when his truck hit a shed and chicken coop.

The CHP says 78-year-old John Horner was driving a 1982 Amgen truck and pulling trailer along Fricot City Road last night. The truck slipped into neutral while going down a hill near Sheep Ranch Road and Horner lost control of the vehicle.

The truck went across an open field and first struck a tree. Horner then re-entered Sheep Ranch Road, went off the road again, and traveled through a wire fence on private property. The truck slammed into a shed and then a chicken coop, causing the trailer to overturn. The shed started on fire, and many of the contents inside the building were damaged.

Horner reported no injuries. The accident occurred at 5:40pm on Monday.